In 2025, the New York Jets put together an unforgettable season worthy of eternal remembrance. When footballs were being passed through the air — a pretty common occurrence in the sport of football — this team of professional football players all of a sudden had all their talents stolen by the Monstars.
That is the most logical explanation for how an NFL team could play an entire (17-game!) season whilst neither producing a single player on offense who could top the meager total of 395 receiving yards NOR a single player on defense who could intercept a single one of the 515 passes that were thrown against ’em.
Here we’ll explore the deep, dark, underworld that is the 2025 Jets and just how inconceivably difficult and unlikely pulling off such levels of ineptitude truly are. Much like Marge before a Halloween special, you must be warned that this gets very, very scary and those of you with young children may want to send them off to bed, lest they be exposed to Jets-itis. You can’t now say you haven’t been appropriately warned.
Written and produced by Alex Rubenstein
Motion graphics and animations by Phil Pasternak
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